Saturday, May 19, 2012
Are You Crunchy Enough?
No, I'm not talking about peanut butter (though that does sound delicious right now.) Everyone seems to be abuzz over the Time Magazine cover with a woman breastfeeding her 3 year old child (seriously, when you need to use a step stool, it's probably time to stop.) I'm not here to weigh in on the cover itself, but more so on this parenting trend that seems to support. Those crunchy parents.
I have been wanting to blog about this for awhile, but not wanting to offend anyone, I have held back my thoughts. But like I've said before, it's my blog so I think I can say what I think, whether it be right or not (though, I'm usually right, just ask my husband;) There just seems to be a lot of talk on crunchy matters as of late, and it just irks me.
I think that my parenting style is kind of middle of the road. I'm by no means crunchy, but I'm also not totally not crunchy. I will breastfeed Karter for a year, maybe longer, I make my own baby food and I cloth diaper. He's gone to the chiropractor a few times. Add those things up and I at least get one crunchy badge, at least I think so. But there are things I do that probably brings those in the crunchy community to tears...I vaccinate my child and firmly believe in doing so, I don't whip out my boob in public and not cover up, I do not co sleep (though there was that month that we had to in order to get any sleep), Karter's eaten his fair share of value brand graham crackers, and I fully believe that one of God's greatest gifts (ok, maybe greatest is a bit extreme) was to give someone knowledge on how to make epidurals. Also, I don't chew my food and then feed Karter mouth to mouth, bird style. I know, terrible mom right here (though he will thank me in a few years when he isn't in therapy in his 20's because pictures of me feeding him mouth to mouth have surfaced on the web.)
I guess it's not so much the crunchy lifestyle that really bothers me, it's the opinionated moms who live it. While advice from other moms is to be expected, I have found that those that are "crunchy" provide the harshest kind of advice with a criticizing undertone. We all mother differently and no one way is right, so I wish people would stop making it seem like there is one magic way to mother your child. To me, a step stool for a 3 year old is created to reach things like the bathroom sink, not my boob.
Well, I could go on for hours, but my child has been fussing for the last few minutes because he wants out of his crib (gasp! He will probably have brain damage one day because I let him cry!), so I should probably attend to him. Like I said, this isn't to offend anyone, but just to provide my own two cents.
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Well Said, Megan. Well Said. I think you are my favorite blogger, and honestly, the only one I read regularly. You have a lot to say, and what you say means a lot!!!!! Thanks for making me smile, and think. I'm sure that you are a great mom, (even if you don't bird-feed your son!)
ReplyDeleteThanks Becca! I couldn't ask for a better follower;)
ReplyDeleteMegan - thanks for saying what needs to be said. I'll just leave it at that. Coming from a conventional farm, I'll take my chances with that over an organic farm anyday. Again, don't want to get started, but there are alot of "non-trues" out there and marketing is having a hey-day with all of this organic, all earth, crunchy business.
ReplyDeleteSarah D -
Preach it girl. I don't even think what you said in your blog was that extreme or offensive. I feel like people are getting way too judgemental anymore. Maybe i never really noticed it before, but I feel like there has been a gradual shift over the past few years into harshly judgemental. Good for you for speaking your opinion freely and mothering the way you see fit. :)I'm.
ReplyDeleteJenna
Sometimes we feel others are judging us when in reality we are just insecure in our choices as moms. Stand for what you believe, ignore critical people and consider advice with an open mind (we aren't always as right as we think we are--there are things EACH of us can learn). There is nothing wrong with being "middle of the road" in your parenting. However, why should people who have strong believes be criticized for the way they parent? And I'm pretty sure that Time magazine put the largest 3 year old possible on a step stool to create a disturbing image. I seriously doubt that is the method she uses to nurse. That assumption is almost as judgemental as the unsolicited advice you've received on CIO methods.
ReplyDeletePerhaps you are missing the point of what I am saying. It's not the 'crunchy' lifestyle that I really have the issue with, it's the crunchy moms. It's not that I feel judged by them, it's that it is obnoxious that people think there is only one way to parent and it's theirs. I know I make a ton of mistakes and that all that I do is not right, but in my experience, "crunchy" moms present their way of parenting as the only way. I'm all about learning ways to improve my child's life and make him more healthy, but when it's presented to me in a way that is offensive and judgmental, then I'd rather just continue feeding him value brand graham crackers.
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